Even CDOs have better prospects

They told him when he was a kid and didn't have the time to study for exams, that if he is so irresponsible he will never get a good job. And somehow, his parents, like most of the other million parents in India convinced him that getting a good job tantamounts to working in the US and this is the ultimate requirement for a marrying a beautiful girl. However, now that he did the former the latter doesn't seem to happen. He is facing a crisis that was a resultant of the sub-prime crisis which if not resolved quickly could very well lead to a premature mid-life crisis. He could not find a life partner. 

His parents have tried a lot. They went to Brahmin's Association and released multiple editions of his horoscopes and followed it up with frequent updates of his resumes. They never missed a marriage because that is where most of the networking for future alliances happen. And they were proactive enough to even attend all Sabhas in December. Still, nothing happened. His parents even told him that if he finds a girl in US it is alright with them as long as she is a Tamil Brahmin. How would they know that they are talking about an impossibility. Girls nowadays are 'committed' before they even come to the US. Those darned guys in colleges are smarter now than they were during his college days. Still if there are some single girls in US they tend to get into a relationship within their first year at a University to a proactive guy who provided them with unsolicited taxi services. And the microscopic population of girls who escaped all these vices and are still in the market tend to be those that are too overwhelming for him because of their newly acquired 'independent, career oriented' mindsets or because they just dont live up to his expectations of being a homely girl. 

His parents broadened their scope and shortlisted some girls and asked him to come to India. When he went there, he realized that people no longer were interested in US: either they did not like going to US or they were just afraid to marry a person whose job is dangling more freely than the sacred thaali. Apparently the stocks of a guy working in US have crashed along with Wall Street.

He felt totally short-sold  and had almost decided that his fate was to be a bachelor for life, when he picked up today's newspaper. His eyes skimmed through the entire article but locked onto one paragraph:

For instance, Ms. Seth says she likes nice clothes and would like to have a flat-screen TV. "Is he really prepared to provide the kind of lifestyle that I have right now?" She expects a husband to earn more than she does.

This somehow made him happy. All hopes may not be lost yet. So with a renewed vigor and with an optimism fueled by desperation, he logged onto his computer. "can i be your fraanship?" he typed. Maybe she could be the one, he thought as he clicked on send.

P.S.: This was obviously inspired by the linked article and a recent spurt in the demand for a story by me from some good samaritans who, I think, did it just to keep me in good spirits hoping that I don't take their request seriously.

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Worn out terror

Finally, the Obama team does something sensible. Whether it is out of a sense of compunction or aimed at primarily distancing itself from the acts of the previous regime is debatable. I have already harped on about how the phrase infuriated me.

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Hyprocricy en masse

Finally, a piece in CNN that I can completely agree with. I thought the day would never come. Everybody, including the Government have a easy punch bag with the Big 3. Though they are far from being innocent, nevertheless they provide the ideal outlet for people to vent their ires on: a highly paid CEO of a struggling company who goes on a leased jet to ask for money to run a company that fires people in thousands, the same people who are part of the infamous UAW and supposedly getting paid a fairy tale amount of $30/hour. It couldn't get better. It is a clear case of the bully picking on the weakest kid and twisting his arm. That is what is being done to the auto companies. Even though they deserve it, everybody should take responsibility instead of pointing fingers. For example, Wagoner is being accused of turning a blind eye to fuel efficient cars and instead focusing on SUVs and pick-up trucks. Well, who bought those pick-up trucks? Did people buy the pick-up trucks because that was the only vehicles in the market or did GM make those because it had the biggest demand? Naturally, a company would exploit the demand in the market. You want a big car? You get it. You want a retrofitted Corvette? You get it. Clearly, these are not the days when you can say, "you can order any color as long it is black" and get away with it. So why blame them now for having provided you with what you wanted all these years? Look within.

On an another note here is a piece from Paul Krugman, one of the most vocal critics of the way the current crisis is being handled:

Underlying the glamorous new world of finance was the process of securitization. Loans no longer stayed with the lender. Instead, they were sold on to others, who sliced, diced and puréed individual debts to synthesize new assets. Subprime mortgages, credit card debts, car loans — all went into the financial system’s juicer. Out the other end, supposedly, came sweet-tasting AAA investments. And financial wizards were lavishly rewarded for overseeing the process.

But the wizards were frauds, whether they knew it or not, and their magic turned out to be no more than a collection of cheap stage tricks. Above all, the key promise of securitization — that it would make the financial system more robust by spreading risk more widely — turned out to be a lie. Banks used securitization to increase their risk, not reduce it, and in the process they made the economy more, not less, vulnerable to financial disruption.

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பாம்பையும் பார்பனையும் கண்டால் முதலில் பார்பனை அடி

Hahahahaha. Oh my God. I couldn't stop laughing on reading this:

..he (S.Ve.Shekar) said he would soon meet Chief Minister M. Karunanidhi and request him for 7 per cent reservation for the Brahmin community. “I am sure he will agree, and when he does, I will show my gratitude by campaigning for him among the Brahmins. Even if I don’t, the community will unanimously thank him and lend support"

He might as well expect Karunanidhi to turn up at Kapaleeshwarar temple with him, since he is the current Mylapore MLA. What an ass! After criticizing politicians in his plays, he doesnt mind becoming one of them now.

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Make hay while the sun shines

It started with the CEOs of the big three. Now, the latest person at the receiving end is AIG's recently appinted CEO Edward Liddy who has to defend himself against the 'malfeasance' of his predecessors.

The politicians all over the US have rallied unanimously for the good of the common people by taking the opportuned moments provided by this recession. The result: all CEOs of failing companies being summoned one after the other to stand at the center of Capitol Hill's Rotunda and get fired from all sides. All of this creates good visuals and catchy headlines. But the same Congressman where wallowing under the money rain that was pouring everywhere when these companies where doing what they did always: indiscretionary spending. 

What a farce!

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What happened then? Did it work?

The one thing I hate about media is their lack of accountability and responsibility. When they report an incident considering it to be newsworthy (even though it is totally unimportant), the readers have the full rights to know the complete background and the end results. If you say that the Indian cricket team is touring New Zealand, you do not leave it at that. You follow it up with complete coverage of what happened in New Zealand (with some times going into really unwanted details). I demand that same yardstick applies to all reported news items; especially those that receive a big coverage.

We have read many reports of how marriages are performed to animals in different parts of India for several reasons, though the most common reason tends to be for invoking rain. Now everybody who reads news in India knows that such marriages are common. In fact, there have been coverages of marriages where a man or a woman ends up getting married to an animal such as a donkey or a dog. So when you report something that is already known just because it creates some false excitement amidst the readers, you better hold yourself accountable and follow up with that news piece. In this case, I claim my right to know whether the move paid off and if the Assamese did get rain very soon after this marriage or if Barun Devata was unmoved even after such a great offering. If it did work maybe everyone can practise these rituals whenever rain is wanted.

When people start demanding that providing coverage of just the incident is not enough and that they need further follow up, then the media will stop coverage of such silly things.

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The Thin Line

Did some one call Sachin a monkey ala Symonds?

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ஐயா பாருங்க, அம்மா பாருங்க, நானும் யோக்யன்தான்

Its like a TASMAC shop owner organizing an Alcoholic Anonymous. He will stake a claim for being righteous and the society will praise him for that.

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I.R. Baboon

“The West is promoting obscenity in Pakistan by promoting sports among girls’ educational institutions. It is a matter of shame for us that our daughters are playing cricket, hockey, football, and so on. The conspiracy is to change madrasas into regular schools and colleges. These conspiracies have been hatched by the enemies of Islam.”

- Editor of al-Qalam, a Weekly Magazine in Pakistan

Zarb-e-Taiba, Lashkar-e-Taiba's magazine, adds,

"Israel is a very tiny country but it does not play cricket. Therefore, it is progressing. We should throw the bat and seize the sword and instead of hitting six or four, cut the throats of the Hindus and the Jews. The sports of a mujahid are archery, horse-riding and swimming. Apart from these sports, every hobby is un-Islamic. The above are not just sports but exercises for jihad. Cricket is an evil and sinful sport. Under the intoxication of cricket, Pakistanis have forgotten that these Hindu players come from the same nation that had raped our mothers, sisters, daughters, wives and daughters-in-law.”

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Even Ravichandran has Oscar

We, in India, have so many talents both inside and outside the film industry that winning an Oscar is no big deal. I rest my case with this video.




P.S: The above is not a sarcasm. I really think the guy who did this editing and remix deserves an award :)

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